Teaching Your Kids Self-Efficacy
My friend Darrick has two daughters. He recently posted this list of rules for his daughters to live by (written by Jennifer Saunders Fans) and I like how it puts the responsibility on the child and not on the parent to look inside for their own guidance to "do the right thing" as it applies to each situation.
Parenting teens is hard...but teaching them to be resilient and to have grit is even harder! While no list is absolute nor complete, I think this is a great list for any child to have on hand.
Rules to teach your daughters:
Make your bed every day, even if it's right before you get in it.
You don’t have to wear underwear... if you're in an accident they’ll just cut your clothes off anyway.
Travel light through life. Keep only what you need.
It’s okay to cry when you’re hurt. It’s also okay to smash (some) things; but, wash your face, clean your mess, and get up off the floor when you’re done. You don’t belong down there.
If you’re going to curse, be clever. If you’re going to curse in public, know your audience.
Seek out the people and places that resonate with your soul.
Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
5-second rule. It’s just dirt. There are worse things in a fast food cheeseburger.
You are a woman, you do not NEED a man!
Happiness is not a permanent state. Wholeness is. Don’t confuse these.
If you’re staying more than one night, unpack your bag.
Never walk through an alley.
Be less sugar, more spice, and only as nice as you’re able to without compromising yourself.
Can’t is a cop-out.
Hold your heroes to a high standard. Then be your own hero.
If you can’t smile with your eyes, don’t smile. Insincerity is nothing to aspire to.
Never lie to yourself.
Your body, your rules.
If you have an opinion, you better know why.
Practice your passions.
Ask for what you want. The worst thing they can say is no.
Wish on stars and dandelions, then get to work to make them happen.
Stay as sweet as you are.
Fall in love often. Particularly with ideas, art, music, literature, food and far-off places.
Fall hard and forever in love with nothing but yourself.
Say Please, Thank You, and Pardon Me, whenever the situation warrants it.
Reserve “I’m sorry” for when you truly are.
Naps are for grown-ups, too.
Question everything, except your own intuition.
You have enough. You are enough.
You are amazing! Don't let anyone ever make you feel you are not. If someone does....walk away. You deserve better.
No matter where you are, you can always come home.
Be happy and remember your roots, family is EVERYTHING.
More on this soon...but right now I am still taking it all in!